Well that's a wrap...no call in to work tonight!

Theoretical phone call...

Phone rings...

Me...hey this is Solomon

Lt....hey bud how ya doing?

Me...oh hey bro, I'm good, what ya got Lt?

Lt...hey we're running a shift shortage, ya think you can come in...we're really hurting...

Me....oh damn Sir, look I'm all about it bro but ya see I've been drinking since 1300 and well you know...

Lt...got ya but this looks like it might be a thing so clear your bar cause I might have to hit ya again...

Me...no doubt!  Got ya!

End of call...

Me...bullet dodged by the copious consumption of alcohol!

This was just a dramatization and does not in fact reflect real life events ;)